Skipping grades no matter how smart a child is hurts them, amirite?

The school wanted to have me skip a grade but my mother said no because my sister was a year older, and she didn't want her so feel self conscious having her little brother in the same grade as her. For a long time I was mad about it but in retrospect it was probably for the best, I already got the "gifted kid" curse lord knows what that would've done

by Anonymous 2 days ago

Good thing this didn't happen! In my tutoring place we have twins with a grade difference which makes the one in my grade feel inferior although he's "normal" for his grade! It's a pity because twins are compared by everyone, admittedly even us teacher.

by Anonymous 2 days ago

Yeah. It's practically the worst thing you could do for a kids social development. They'll feel isolated and out of place. Children under the age of 16 also have no business going to college early.

by Anonymous 2 days ago

I know what you're talking about: my parents made me skip a grade when I was 13 because they were manipulated by an ill-intended psychologist. The result was that I was constantly bullied and I never made a friend, I was never invited to a party and I never had a girlfriend. My life really sucked.

by Anonymous 2 days ago

Yep, I wasn't trying to simplify it but not write an essay. I've tutored kids, and there's two kinds of smart kids. Some smart kids finish work just to have free time to get started on their homework, and smart kids who usually don't even finish work but are already slacking, even if they are smart. We can't say all smart kids will be the latter, as I've seen plenty of the former. Nevertheless, jumping grades is detrimental to their social abilities. Putting bullying and being targets aside, do you think an eight year old in general want to play with other eight year olds or hang around with taller and bigger ten year olds?

by Anonymous 2 days ago

Exactly this. It's really all dependent on the individual child and the school district on whether it is in their best interest. The idea that the decision to skip grades inherently hurts a child is flawed.

by goyettemariana 2 days ago

"They're bullied, or can't make genuine friends within the higher [same] grade. The better the do on tests the more their classmates despise them/feel worse about themselves." All of those things can and do happen when kids who are academically ready to skip a grade aren't allowed to advance.

by Anonymous 2 days ago

Can confirm from personal experience. My parents opted not to move me ahead and I was so bored I never learned to study properly, never learned how to deal with academic challenges, was an extremely unfocused student, and I struggled with this stuff all through college. Got regularly bullied for being ahead. Meet the kids where they're at and maybe focus more on dealing with the bullies instead

by gordonrobel 2 days ago

Agreed, this can happen to any kid. However, if you allow a child to advance academically, this child is in the spotlight, they're the target even before they can "choose" (assuming the parents are choosing, as in most cases).

by Anonymous 2 days ago

Nevermind that when kids get bored in school, it negatively impacts their studies, even if that boredom is from being beyond the material that they are currently studying.

by goyettemariana 2 days ago

Most importantly I'm really not sure there's any benefit to it. Like, why? To get into the dread of early career one year sooner? For what?

by Anonymous 2 days ago

Agreed, I don't see the problem at all. A genius kid breezing through easy classes doesn't hurt anyone, why make them lose their childhood? I'm a tutor and it seems like sadly this is even more common nowadays

by Anonymous 2 days ago

Luckily for me I was as big as the kids a year older.

by Anonymous 2 days ago

Woahh alright big man

by Anonymous 2 days ago

If they're small and can't adapt they'd be targets for bullying regardless. A charismatic 6'5 jock wouldn't have anyone daring to bully them regardless if he's grades ahead and doing better than his classmates.

by Kiehnosborne 2 days ago

Strongly disagree. Is this what we get out of the no kid left behind doctrine? 99 kids out of a hundred will never advance past "I can use ChatGPT". If you are that one single kid who might not be part of those… then I don't know. You'd probably deserve it for being lazy. You'd also regret it for the rest of your life. Of course, with current SATISFACTION NOW mentality and nobody caring about next week, I guess it's to be expected. Still the pinnacle of idiocy though. If you have a kid that's genuinely smarter than the rest of them, and not just in your imagination, you put it with like minded kids. That much should be obvious. Although… "my kid can stand on one leg for 31 seconds" doesn't make it smart, no matter how much you think it does.

by westashlee 2 days ago

My school district wouldnt let me skip. I got so bored with school that I gave up and became a slacker, a habit that I was never able to get rid of once it started.

by AdhesivenessAway 2 days ago

Maybe fix the bullying problem then? If that was realistic, don't you think we would have done that already?

by Anonymous 2 days ago

There's no "fixing" human nature. Any group of people staying together always develops some power structure. Which manifests as a form of bullying almost every time.

by Anonymous 2 days ago

you can fix the bullying but the kids won't accept a younger kid as an equal regardless, they will always be ostracized

by Ryan71 2 days ago

Thats the case in a lower grade as well, because the kid is way better than the level of education it's receiving if you don't fix that by skipping a grade. I'm no expert by any means, but acting like the disconnect or bullying doesn't occur when being held back is a crazy take.

by Rudolph08 2 days ago

Staying in your own class is not being held back? Not sure if you remember being a kid but there was a clear difference between you and the kids a grade above/below you

by Anonymous 2 days ago

I don't really understand what my experience has to do with it, since I didn't have to skip a grade. I don't think you understand what it means to be so far ahead there is norhing for you to learn in your own grade. You are held back if you don't get an education and that's what happens if you are in a class where you are not learning anything because you are progressing way faster

by Rudolph08 1 day ago

I skipped a grade and I am grateful that I was allowed to. School was that easy that I became extremely lazy even while skipping a grade. If I hadn't have skipped a grade my the efforts I've had to go through to fix that would be way worse. Sure it does have some negative effects but the benefits far outweigh the negatives

by jakubowskidomin 1 day ago

is this purely an American thing??

by enahammes 1 day ago

💯 agree with this. As a child who skipped a grade, while everyone else was getting their learners permit to drive and having their sweet 16. I felt left out. Especially in college, everyone is drinking while you are by default, the designated driver. I didn't fit in with kids younger than me (I had the "been there, done that" mentality), and older kids looked down on me. Skipping a grade puts you in limbo. I highly do not recommend this for any child, find another outlet for them.

by emieorn 1 day ago

In Australia, skipping grades is extremely rare because of what you mentioned. Basically the kid can be smart af but not socially ready for the older years. My son is 8 is , gifted with an IQ of 145. He has what's called an IEP (Independent education plan) So he is given mostly year 6 and 7 work but still participates in his year 3 class. He is also given extra projects to work on when he's finished his work and leaves class to sit in year 6 for maths and English. I think this approach is great because he still gets to spend time with his friends and not feel any more different than he already is.

by Anonymous 1 day ago

As far as I can see its only really america that does this weird practice

by Anonymous 1 day ago

This. When I was a freshman in highschool there was a kid who was 12, luckily he had friends and wasn't bullied (from what I know) but it isn't the right environment for a kid, he was making jokes that were WAY too much for a 12yo

by Anonymous 1 day ago

I didn't skip but I was early so everyone was older than me. It was fine until Junior High and my Freshman year when everyone was a year or sometimes 2 older. Then I became the best player on the hockey team and it didn't matter anymore.

by Anonymous 1 day ago